Have woken up a couple of mornings this week thinking I've heard Mom saying my name. Don't think that was what woke me this morning, but I continue to wake up early. When I did wake up this morning, I could smell eggs cooking downstairs. I went down thinking it probably meant Dad was up. When I got down there, there was no one awake.

We believed at one point that the house in Lake Wilson is haunted. There were several occassions when we'd smell burnt toast in the dining room or living room of the house. We'd check the toaster and find no evidence of it being used. One time Mom and I had went to Pipestone for groceries. We started unloading into the kitchen. When we were done, we heard the bathroom sink faucet running. Neither of us had been in there and no one had been in the house while we were gone (Mark and Dad, the only other people with keys were at a farm painting). There were a few times I was home alone, doing something in my room and I'd hear a door open and close downstairs. When we had Winter and Collosus, they'd lie on the living room floor and suddenly both focus on the exact same spot on the ceiling and track something as it moved either across the floor upstairs or across the ceiling. Freaky stuff. Mom always believed. I have kind of gone both ways, but am more in the believing mode now, though it is with a healthy dose of skepticism.

MIssing Amy and the kids last night. I was in SIoux Falls Thurs. night for a meeting for work. Tonight in Lake Wilson. I was really missing them as I went upstairs to wind down and go to sleep. On top of the fan was a tiny piece of play dough and when I turned on the t.v., it was still tuned to the Cartoon Network. Felt more connected to them.

Found "Fargo" on this morning on A&E. I remember watching it with my folks and Amy. While watching the movie a commercial came on for a product called Aleulasta (hope I spelled it right) - a drug for chemo pts. to keep their white blood cell counts elevated so they don't have to delay a treatment. Oh, the side effect of it is mild to moderate bone pain. Oh, and in rare cases it causes the spleen to rupture. Where the fuck can I sign up for this wonder drug. I appreciate the pharmaceutical companies coming out with all these drugs to treat side effects of chemo., and different drugs to use in the chemo. Yep, I'd bet cancer medication is a pretty big business (CRAZY CONSPIRACY THEORY ALERT ----- SKIP TO THE NEXT PARAGRAPH IF YOU DON'T WANT TO HEAR MY RAMBLINGS) which is why there is no rush to cure cancer. There is too much money being made by running a half-dozen cycles of chemo., doing radiation, etc. The profit margain wouldn't be as high if cancer was cured and people only had to pay for the cure. Less repeat business. Hardly any of those side effects that need other meds. to treat. How many drug company CEO's have died of cancer? How many (former) presidents of the U.S? How many members of Congress (current or retired)? Maybe now that our president has been elected, he'll grow a pair of cajones and take on the drug companies - after all, he's got the money he needed out of them to get back into office. Maybe not, though. I'm sure he's gotten used to sucking on the drug companies collective dicks for all these years.

Dad's up. Said Mom was up several times in the night - 11, 3, and 7. She's sleeping now. I'm planning on leaving once hospice has been here this morning.