I feel so alone right now. I had a really, really good birthday today. Amy and the kids were great. We lunched at McDonald’s, had some salmon for dinner, played outside a little bit. Just had a nice time overall.

At the moment, it is going on 10:30 PM. As the night wore on tonight, I felt myself getting further and further down. A big thing weighing on me is that no one in my family called to wish me a happy birthday. I was expecting that my dad, at least, would call. I know that he was planning on going out to the cemetery today to see the marker for Mom, and that I’m the first of their kids to have a birthday since she died. I keep telling myself that he’s probably struggling to get through the day. I just know that if Mom were here, the call would have come this evening. I know that if Grandma hadn’t died last week, she’d have called either yesterday or Sunday to wish me a happy birthday. My brother did send a note with a Cubs pin, which I really appreciated, so there has been acknowledgement of my birthday by my family, just not what I am used to or what I feel I needed tonight. I just ache right now. I’m going to bed.